I still have a photograph of the very first moment I fell head over heels in love with your smile.
Spring break. Sitting on a park bench on the Avenue, I was feeling like I was a universe away from myself, and I can’t explain why, cuz I didn’t do it consciously, but I stared at you. Your eyes were closed. You were calm, sharing pieces of pastry with gluttonous pigeons at your feet.
Please don’t look at me.
I notice the humor of your eyes where I saw a hurricane and thought I could name it. I am a wave tossed seashell – inside, there is only the sound of you.
I have weak ankles and a big cock.
Outside, where the cars were parked, You unzipped my pants and pulled me out with polished nails while you were grinning. I fucked you on the hood of a lexus that didn’t belong to me and I secretly hoped your boyfriend would catch us. Still later, we burned out, got lost, sidetracked our dreams. Obsessed over the hour hand.
I went home.
Felt guilty- puked and started crying.